Some Labels are Best Left in the Closet.

It's dawned on me, today more than ever, people's obsession with labels with relationships.

People, including myself, are so focused on being in a relationship. They want a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife; that definite title. A lot of people think that those labels are what make the love between the two people. That's not the case. You don't have to make anything official to be madly in love with someone. You don't need a ring on your finger, or a piece of paper to make it that you are going to be with that one person for the rest of your life. Don't get me wrong. I am a sap for that whole white wedding, bouquet, walking down the isle to the man that I love thing, but at the same time, what does all of the really mean? What does some stupid status change on Facebook really mean? It's there to satisfy the need to publicize things. It's there to shut up those who ask "well, if you love each other, why don't you be together?". To be totally honest as well, whether you are in a relationship, or married, or simply share a love with someone, nothing guarantees that your other won't leave you. Nothing in this world, nothing you say or do can stop that person from leaving you alone. The only aspect that keeps him/her from leaving, is his/her own thoughts and actions. We don't control other people. Other people don't control us. Free will is the main idea.

People can be in a relationship, or marriage, for years and year, but randomly one day, leave. They will leave without notice, nothing said. They will leave when things are good, or if things are bad. Nothing stops people from leaving. So this makes being in a relationship totally counter productive, in a sense.

I really don't knock relationships. I think that they are great. Hell, I love being in a relationship with someone that I love. But at the same time, labels are labels. The title of "boyfriend/girlfriend" are just names. Those things don't make the love between 2 people more, or less. Just because 2 people aren't "together" doesn't mean that they both don't love each other. It's a hard thing to come into terms with. Hell, it's taken me this long to realize that labels don't equal love. But now I really do see that labels are just words. Labels are words to help fill voids that aren't even really there.

I guess that this whole idea sprung from the movie Sex and the City. Carrie and Big's relationship wasn't the cliche kind. It was filled with hardship, distance, confusion, other people, and pain. It's pretty much the epitome of a REAL LIFE relationship. It entailed things that normal couples could go through, with out any bull, fluffy stuff. Yes, in the end they did end up together, but it, in a sense, told the truth to the ordeals that many couples have to face in the real world! It's none of the fairy tale stuff that only happens to 5% of the population.

I think that it has to do with people's obsession with perfection. How everything has to be perfect and set in stone. People, including myself, are so scared of others leaving. Lets face it, no one really wants to be alone in the world. At the end of those long days at work, we would like to come home to someone that cares for us (whether that be a boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband or someone that your not "with"). Everyone wants to feel wanted. The perfect fairy tale ending where he/she is mine and I'm his/hers doesn't always exist and in this day and age isn't even right for everyone.

Another thing that has dawned on me is that I really do believe in fate and free will, at the same time. That is also extremely counterproductive, but it believe in both. I think that people have the right to leave if and when they want to, but I also believe that if something is meant to be, in the end, it will be. I confuse myself all of the time. I guess that it's my wishful thinking. I think that it's me, stuggling to make the best of things; it's me trying my hardest to focus on the light in the situation, and not the dark.

I can't help these things. I am human. I have human tendencies. I feel hurt, I cry, I yearn for certain people. Yes, I want the perfect ending. No, I don't want to have to work really hard for something because it means that I have to be hurt. But I know that in the end, it will be worth it. I love someone with all of my heart, and it's something that he knows. For right now, things may not be perfect, hell nothing is ever perfect in this world, but the fact is that my love for him is there, and it's strong. My love for him is the only thing that truly matters. The love that I have for him, will always exist.

"And we were dressed from head to toe in love.." That's the only label that will ever matter.