Disease

I am so tired of being the bigger person. I really wish I could simple not care anymore, but what good will that do, right? I just don't know anymore. I tried! I can honestly say that I tried. With that same thought, I don't think that effort is ever sent my way, but that's life. It is what it is.

I am honestly really glad for most of the people I have met up here. You really know who has your back when certain situations come about, and that's what it all comes down too. Not everyone in this world is going to be good to you, I have experienced that FIRST hand, but you always have to allow some openness to find people like some of the people I've met. It's a good thing for that.

I'm always going to be the type of person that is going to put up with a lot of things. Between family and other nonsense, I know that I am always going to be the one to endure a lot. I have become okay with it. I have honestly accepted it at this point. It is what it is, like I said.

I have really come to realize that certain things are going to haunt me for a while. I guess I might have brought that upon myself with the past. Karma is a bitch? It's not really a question, but it's more of a fact. Karma is a bitch, but I wish I can know what I have done. I guess that's something to be left up in the air...

I have loved one more than anything in this world. I swear, I would really give up a lot for this kid. I would give up so much, it's pretty crazy. But, like everything else in my world, things never really work out for me. I don't know. I don't think that I have done anything wrong... but then again, knowing me, I probably did something to mess everything up. I guess I can't blame those who hurt me. More chances for me to get hurt, stomped on, and forgotten will be given out. Not a problem.

"I thought love would be my cure- But now it's my disease." True Story.